Search results for: ""Rabbinic""

Mikva in Nature: Rabbinic Guidance
Rabbinic guidance is recommended when using a river, lake, or spring as a mikva due to:
  • Problems of mud, dirt, or sand, and
  • Difficulty in checking if the person is fully underwater,
  • It might not be a kosher mikva.
Note This section applies to the immersion of both utensils and people, since the same principles apply.
Birkat HaMazon D'Rabanan: Rabbinic Source
Although the mitzva d'oraita is to thank God only when you are satiated from the meal, chazal decreed that we say birkat ha'mazon even when eating only the volume of a k'zayit and even if not satiated. So you must still say birkat ha'mazon after eating at least 1.3 fl. oz. (39 ml, or 1/6 cup) of bread within four minutes--even if you are not full.  This is known as birkat ha'mazon d'rabanan.
Introduction to Food Nullification: Utensils (Kashering)
Food Nullification in Utensils: Torah-Law and Rabbinic Decree
By Torah law (d'oraita), any clean utensil, countertop, etc., automatically reverts to neutral/pareve and kosher after not being heated to more than 120° F (49° C) for 24 hours.
But by rabbinic decree, utensils do not automatically become neutral/pareve even after 24 hours and must be kashered by heat (libun—direct heat; hag'ala—boiling in a pot; or eruy rotchim—pouring boiling water over item) or, if some types of glass, by soaking in water (meluy v'eruy ).
 
Changing Gender of Utensil
You may kasher a pot or cooking/eating utensil from:
  • Non-kosher to kosher, or
  • Year-round use (chametz) to kosher for Passover.
 
You may not intentionally kasher a utensil in order to change it from dairy to meat or meat to dairy; you must first kasher it from accidentally (or intentionally) non-kosher to kosher/pareve, or from non-Passover to Passover/pareve. You may then use it for either dairy or meat.

Once you have used it for that gender, the item retains that gender (unless you re-kasher it for Passover or you make it non-kosher first, then kasher it to neutral/pareve).
But if you accidentally heat meat with a dairy utensil or vice versa, you may kasher it back to its original gender by any one of the kashering methods, depending on how it became non-kosher.
 
Items/Materials that Can Be Kashered
The following materials can be kashered:
  • Glass, including Corelle, if not used directly on the stove or oven. Glass does not change gender or other kosher status unless heated on a flame or in the oven. Unless it is heated in this way, glass does not ever need to be kashered (except for Passover) (see Meluy v'Eruy, below).Glass, including Corelle, if not used directly on the stove or oven. Glass does not change gender or other kosher status unless heated on a flame or in the oven. Unless it is heated in this way, glass does not ever need to be kashered (except for Passover) (see Meluy v'Eruy, below).Glass, including Corelle, if not used directly on the stove or oven. Glass does not change gender or other kosher status unless heated on a flame or in the oven. Unless it is heated in this way, glass does not ever need to be kashered (except for Passover) (see Meluy v'Eruy, below).
   NOTE  Glass used directly on fire or in the oven (kli rishon) cannot
  be kashered except by heating in a kiln.
  • Granite (not granite composite)
  • Marble
  • Wood, if smooth (see notes on Eruy Rotchim, below)
  • Metal, including stainless steel, cast iron, and aluminum.
Note While metal can be kashered if thoroughly cleaned, welded handles and other difficult-to-clean parts may render a metal utensil not kasherable. You might be able to use libun kal on the problematic area and still use hag'ala for the remainder of the utensil.
 
Items/Materials that Cannot Be Kashered
  • China
  • Corian
  • Corningware
  • Crockpot
  • Formica
  • Glass that has been used directly (kli rishon) on a stove or in an oven; however it can be kashered in a kiln
  • Granite (composite)
  • Knives with Plastic Handles (knives with wooden handles may be kashered if there are no cracks in the wood and if the rivets do not have spaces that catch food and prevent you from cleaning it completely)
  • Mixer-there might be exceptions. Consult a rabbi.
  • Plastic
  • Porcelain (Enamel)
  • Pyrex (if used directly on stove or in oven--kli rishon)
  • Rubber (synthetic)
  • Silestone
  • Silverstone
  • Stoneware
  • Teflon
  • Toaster/Toaster Oven
  • Waffle Iron.
 
Pot Lid Handle
Kashering
The handle on a pot lid does not need to be kashered for normal use during the year. 
Reason It does not normally get hot.
Cleaning
However, the pot lid handle must be removed and the lid cleaned where the handle attaches, if possible.
Note If the gap between the handle and lid cannot be completely cleaned, you may not use that lid for Passover and you normally may not kasher it if it becomes non-kosher. If the lid handle cannot be removed, consult a rabbi.

Pot or Pan Handle
A plastic handle that gets hot, especially if it is over a flame on a burner, may not be kashered. If the handle becomes non-kosher, it must be replaced. If a plastic handle connects directly to the metal of the utensil, consult a rabbi about what to do.
 
Food Nullification: Heat-Kashering
Three Methods of Heat-Kashering
Heat-Kashering is of three types:  Libun, Hag'ala, and Eruy Rotchim.
  1. Libun (Direct Heat)
    How It Works  Burns up any residual food taste
 
 What It Works On
Complete Burning (Libun gamur --heating metal red-hot).  Stoves, ovens, grills, grates, baking pans, roasting pans, etc., that were ever used with direct heat MUST be kashered by heating to red-hot (libun gamur). Libun gamur works on anything except pottery (this is a rabbinic injunction since you might not do a good job).
 
Light Burning (Libun kal--heating metal hot enough to burn paper on the side opposite the one being heated).  You may use this method whenever there is a question of whether an item needs libun. For example, food may have overflowed onto gas-stove grates. Due to safek, we use libun kal-- gas-stove grates do not need libun gamur.
 
 Process 
Libun Gamur The entire metal substance of a utensil, oven, or other cooking surface becomes red hot, but the item does not need to be red hot all at the same time: it may be heated sequentially as long as the entire surface gets red hot at some time. Libun gamur can be done by blowtorch or by placing the item in a kiln. 
 
Libun Kal
  • Direct a flame, such as a blowtorch, onto the inside of a pot. Pot is hot enough when a piece of paper that touches the outside of the utensil burns (it does not need to burst into flame, just to smolder), or
  • Put the pot into the oven at 500 ° F for 40 minutes. (First, remove any non-metal handles; they will need to be kashered separately or not used.)
 
   Waiting Time  You do not need to wait at all before kashering by libun--and certainly not the 24 hours needed before kashering by hag'ala.
 
  1. Hag'ala (Boiling)
     
How It Works
Any non-kosher or meat or milk taste is removed from the walls of the utensil during boiling (hag'ala). You may kasher a pot or utensil by either:
  • Boil Method Boiling water within the pot to be kashered, and making the boiling water overflow, or
  • Dip Method Dipping a smaller pot or utensil to be kashered into a larger pot of boiling water.
What It Works On   
Pots and utensils that are used with liquids (meaning, liquid all the time) can be kashered by being immersed in boiling water (hag'ala). The utensil being kashered by hag'ala must be made of a material that can release flavor, such as metal or wood. Materials that cannot be kashered (except in a glazing furnace!) are pottery--and, by extension--china, enamel, and similar materials. 
 
Note  The Boil Method only helps if the utensil became non-kosher due to food inside the utensil. If the non-kosher food was on the outside of the utensil, you may only kasher it by the Dip Method or by libun kal.
 
Note The boiling water must reach at least the same temperature during kashering as when the utensil became non-kosher.
 
Note Once the Passover holiday has begun, chametz cannot be nullified with hot water/hag'ala (only libun can kasher something during Passover). You may only kasher during chol hamoed, not during the first and last (festival) days.
 
Note Whenever hag'ala is effective, you may instead use libun kal, since libun kal is a stronger form of kashering. Sometimes you may find it more convenient to use libun kal to kasher an item that needs only hag'ala.
Situation A metal pot of the opposite gender went through a dishwasher cleaning.
What To Do Even though the pot only needs hag'ala, you may instead kasher it by libun kal by putting it in an oven at 500° F (for this application).

Process
The Boil Method can be used as:
  • Batel BaShishim ("nullifying in 60 times" the volume), or
  • Batel BaRov ("nullifying in a majority"--that is, boiling the item in water that is more than twice the volume but less than 60 times the volume of the non-kosher element).
NoteIf a pot is hot (over 120° F, or 49° C) when only part of the pot becomes non-kosher, the entire pot is non-kosher and its volume is figured into the volume of water needed for boiling.
NoteFor whether the lid becomes non-kosher, consult a rabbi.

In Batel BaShishim, by the actual halacha, you do not need to wait at all before kashering. But the custom is to wait 24 hours--except in extreme circumstances--because it is too hard to figure out 1/60th. In Batel BaRov, you must wait 24 hours.
 
The Boil Method: Batel BaShishim
Using batel ba'shishim for the Boil Method is not customary.  You may use it for emergencies ONLY; ask a rabbi in this case.
Example To kasher a spoon with the batel ba'shishim type of hag'ala, immerse the spoon in boiling water of a volume at least the volume of 60 spoons. No waiting is needed before kashering with this method.
 
The Boil Method: Batel BaRov
To kasher a pot or utensil by hag'ala using batel ba'rov:
  • Clean the pot or utensil well.
  • Wait 24 hours after the pot or utensil was last heated to more than 120° F, or 49° C (such as when it was cleaned).
Reason Waiting 24 hours allows the taste to become “ruined” and then to be nullified (batel) in a majority (ba'rov) of boiling water.
Note During the 24-hour waiting period, you could still “use” the utensil for watering plants, etc., as long as the water remains under 120° F.
  • Fill the pot to the brim with water.
  • Bring the water in the pot to a boil.
  • Cause the water to overflow the entire rim of the pot by:
    • Plunging something hot into the pot (any item that will not cause the water to stop boiling is OK), or
    • Tilting the pot to slosh water over all of the pot's rim.
  • Cool off the pot by dipping it in cold water or putting it under cold running water.
Note If you did not put the utensil under cold water, it is still kosher b'di'avad.
 
The Dip Method
To kasher a smaller pot or any other kasherable cooking or eating utensil by hag'ala, you may dip the pot or utensil into a large, kashered pot containing boiling water.
  • If the pot in which you are kashering the items had been heated to 120° F (49° C), with food of that gender in the pot, or more within the previous 24 hours, the items you are kashering will assume the gender of the pot.
  • If the pot in which you are kashering the items had NOT been heated to 120° F or more for at least 24 hours, any items that are kashered in it will become kosher and pareve.
Note When kashering a utensil by hagala, you may dip it into boiling water one part at a time; that is, you do not need to immerse the entire utensil under the water all at the same time. This is different from doing tevila since for tevila, the entire utensil must be immersed completely.
 
Calculating 24-Hour Waiting Time
Once a pot has become non-kosher due to any reason, if it gets heated to 120° F (49° C) or more with any food or liquid in it, you must wait another 24 hours from the latest heating before you can kasher it, since everything inside the utensil becomes non-kosher again.
 
Calculating Volume
If only part of a pot becomes non-kosher, as long as the pot was hot (over 120° F, or 49° C), the entire pot becomes non-kosher and its volume gets figured into the volume of water needed for boiling.
 
 
  1. Eruy Rotchim (Hot-Water Pour)
 
Process  Pouring hot water over, for example, a sink to kasher it.
 
Waiting Time You must wait 24 hours before kashering by eruy rotchim.
 
Note Only items that became non-kosher by being poured onto, may be kashered via eruy rotchim.
 
Note Smooth-surfaced wood may be kashered through eruy rotchim (pouring boiling water) but ONLY if it became non-kosher through eruy. If it became non-kosher by being cooked or heated in an oven, it may not be kashered via eruy rotchim.
 
Note A wooden cutting board may be kashered if the board is smooth. If it has cracks and crevices, it can be sanded until smooth and then kashered.

 
Food Nullification: Meluy V'Eruy
Meluy V'Eruy To Kasher Glass
Halachically, “glass” includes Arcoroc, Corelle, crystal, Duralex, and Pyrex.
NOTE In pre-war Europe, where glass was expensive and hard to obtain, it was customary to kasher drinking glasses, especially for Passover, by soaking the glasses for three 24-hour periods (meluy v'eruy), as follows:
Step 1: Submerge glasses in cold water for 24 hours.
Step 2: Empty water, refill, and submerge glasses again.
Step 3: Repeat Step 2.
NOTE If any of these materials were heated directly on a flame or other heat source, they cannot be kashered by meluy v'eruy!

Introduction to Shabbat: Meals
Three Shabbat Meals
We are required to eat three Shabbat meals, as a rabbinic (d'rabanan) enactment to enjoy Shabbat (oneg Shabbat). The first Shabbat meal must be at night and the remaining two must be during the day (the third meal must be eaten after halachic midday). Friday night dinner and the first meal on Saturday are preceded by kiddush. For the first two Shabbat meals, say ha'motzi over two complete loaves of bread, each of which is at least 1.3 fl. oz. in volume. For the third meal, the ideal is to use two complete loaves of bread, but the requirement of eating the third meal can also be fulfilled by eating any food other than salt or water.

Source of Saying Shabbat Kiddush
  • Saying kiddush on Shabbat night is a commandment from the Torah (d'oraita).
  • Saying kiddush on Saturday morning is a rabbinical (d'rabanan) enactment.
Note If you did not say Friday night kiddush, you must say that version of kiddush on Shabbat morning and it is then a requirement from the Torah (d'oraita). Do not begin with va'yechulu; instead, begin with borei pri ha'gafen and say the second blessing of kiddush.

Source of Kiddush Location
Saying kiddush at the place where you will eat your meal is a rabbinical (d'rabanan) enactment.

Shabbat Kiddush-Meal Quantities: Evening
  • For evening kiddush, a minimum of 4 fl. oz. (119 ml) of wine must be blessed on and at least half must be drunk.
  • For the evening meal, as on Shabbat lunch and all required Jewish festival meals, a minimum of 1.9 fl. oz. of bread must be eaten within four minutes.

Shabbat Kiddush-Meal Quantities: First Meal on Saturday
Shabbat day first meal has two separate eating requirements.  They may be combined (say/hear kiddush and start the main meal right away) but are often done separately (say/hear kiddush and then eat some mezonot; the main meal is eaten later in the day).
Note Since eating and drinking requirements on all morning kiddushes (both Shabbat and Jewish festivals) are d'rabanan, the required beverage amount for morning kiddush is only 3.3 fl. oz. (99 ml) instead of the d'oraita 4 fl. oz. (119 ml), which is required for kiddushes for Shabbat evening.
1) Morning kiddush requires a halachically legal “meal” with these elements:
      a) Blessing on a minimum of 3.3 fl. oz. (99 ml) of wine (or other beverage),
      b) Someone's drinking at least 2 fl. oz. of the beverage, followed by
      c) Eating at least 1.3 fl. oz. (39 ml, or 1/6 cup) of some type of mezonot (or bread) within four minutes.
Note If you drink at least 3.3 fl. oz. (99 ml) of wine within 30 seconds, you do not need to eat mezonot.
Note You do not need to drink the wine or other kiddush beverage to fulfill “establishing a meal.” You may hear kiddush and then simply eat the required amount of bread or mezonot. This applies to Shabbat or Jewish festivals, evening or morning.
The kiddush “meal” does not have to satiate.
Note If you have not fulfilled the requirements for kiddush, you may not eat other foods, such as fruit or fish at a kiddush.

2) The real meal (kovei'a se'uda) of Shabbat lunch requires eating at least 1.9 fl. oz. (56 ml) of bread (or matza during Passover!) within four minutes. It should include enough food to satiate.
Note You can simultaneously fulfill the requirement to “establish a meal” and to “eat a meal” by eating one (the same) piece of bread.
For details on fulfilling the first two meals' requirements, see Shabbat: Kiddush.

Shabbat: Eating a Meal Requirement: Third Meal
For details on fulfilling the third meal's requirements, see Shabbat: Third Meal (Se'uda Shlishit).
Charity at 10\% After Taxes
You must give 10\% of your net, after-tax income or received gifts of money to charity (ma'aser kesafim), by rabbinic enactment. For what is considered income, see Charity/Tzedaka: On What To Give.
Halachic Stringencies in Doubt
We are stringent in applying laws if we are uncertain about Torah commandments.
We are lenient in applying laws if we are uncertain about rabbinic commandments.
 
Shalom Bayit or Honoring One's Parents (Kibud Av Va'Eim)
The only type of laws that may sometimes be overridden to help with shalom bayit (promoting peaceful family relations) or kibud av va'eim (honoring parents) is rabbinic law, not Torah law. A rabbi should be consulted in these cases.
Jewish Festivals: Business Ownership
A business whose sole or major owner is Jewish may not be operated on Jewish festivals (and Shabbat), even by non-Jewish employees. There may be possibilities to allow operation by relinquishing majority control, but the issues are complex and rabbinic guidance is essential.
Baking Challa at Same Time as Chicken with Sauce
Situation You baked challa with chicken, both uncovered, in the same oven (the chicken DID have sauce).
Status The challa becomes non-kosher even if the sauce was dry by the end of cooking.
Reason A rabbinic enactment requires that challa be pareve, lest someone eat it with the opposite gender food.  Consult a rabbi for exceptions. 
Note The rabbinic enactment applies to all bread, unless it looks different from normal bread or is small enough to eat at one meal.
Owning a Business Operated on Shabbat
A business whose sole or major owner is Jewish may not be operated on Shabbat (and Jewish festivals), even by non-Jewish employees.
Note There may be possibilities to allow operation by relinquishing majority control, but the issues are complex and rabbinic guidance is essential.
Modified Non-Kosher
A non-kosher substance becomes kosher once it is modified and no longer has the original taste.
Example Animal bones are burned for charcoal to filter cane sugar from molasses in order to make white sugar.  The bones are not only not non-kosher, they are pareve.
Note Rabbinic supervision is required to ensure that the bones have been completely burned. 
Shabbat: Candles: How To Do Blessing: Women
Here is the order for blessing over the Shabbat candles by women:
  • Light the candles,
  • Put your hands in front of your eyes (this a universal custom), and
  • Say the blessing lehadlik ner shel Shabbat.
Note It is a custom to make requests at candle lighting, but rabbinic guidance may be helpful in how to structure the request.
Selling Mother Animal before Birth of Petter Rechem
Situation The first-born male baby of a female kosher domestic mammal or of a female donkey, if completely owned by a Jew, is a petter rechem (which may not be used for any purpose).
What To Do Before the mother has her first baby, sell part of her to a non-Jew so the firstborn will not be wholly owned by a Jew and, if male, will not become a petter rechem. Rabbinic guidance is recommended!
Introduction to Shmita
Every seventh year, fruits, vegetables, grains, and legumes grown in Eretz Yisrael are subject to the laws of “shmita,” which entail letting the land rest.
Holiness of Shmita Produce
Fruits, vegetables, grains, legumes, etc., grown in Eretz Yisrael holiness.  This holiness determines how we may treat fruit during shmita, including how to eat it and how to dispose of it.
Which Produce Is Subject to Shmita Laws?
All fruits, vegetables, grains, and legumes that grow in Eretz Yisrael are subject to shmita laws.  However, since there is a rabbinic decree that we may not eat vegetables and grains (called “sfichin”) that grow in Eretz Yisrael during shmita year, we will mainly be discussing fruits.
Note Vegetables, grains, and legumes that are not raised in halachic Eretz Yisrael are never subject to shmita laws.  So if a fruit or vegetable was grown outside the borders of Second Temple period Eretz Yisrael, you may eat that fruit or vegetable with no shmita concerns.  Such areas may include much of the southern part of the State of Israel, including the Arava and southern Negev all the way to Eilat, land south of Gaza, etc.  Some people include the Golan. Many people also include any land currently “owned” by Arabs.
Plants grown off the ground or inside a house are also not subject to shmita.
When Is Shmita?
The next shmita year will be observed beginning Rosh Hashana, September 2014.
Four Most Common Nida Questions
 
  1. What Makes a Woman a Nida
 
Introduction to What Makes a Woman a Nida
Vaginal Blood Flow
Only vaginal blood flow makes a woman nida
 
Nida D'Oraita
According to Torah law (d'oraita), a woman becomes a nida when she experiences a flow of uterine blood, preceded or accompanied by a hargasha. Because uterine blood flow is difficult to distinguish from the more general vaginal blood flow, we assume that a vaginal blood flow is from the uterus--unless a medical person (it could be a midwife) determines that the blood flow is not uterine.
 
Nida D'Rabanan
 
By rabbinic law (d'rabanan), a woman can become a nida even with only a qualifying stain (see below).

Hargasha
A hargasha is anything that signals that the woman's period is imminent. There are three classical hargashot, as well as possible hargashot that pertain only to an individual woman.
Note Many women today do not have hargashot.
 
Classical Hargashot
There are three classical hargashot:
1) Body Tremor
2) Petichat HaMakor
Some women, at petichat ha'makor (“opening of the uterus”), have a sensation of release similar to when one's bladder opens to urinate.
3) Zivat Davar Lach
Sensation of wet discharge that comes only with her period; this is not the wet discharge that every woman normally feels multiple times daily.
Note She does not necessarily need to feel it coming from her cervix in order for it to make her a nida.
 
Individual Hargashot
What Is an Individual Hargasha
The individual hargasha can be any physiological occurrence (pimples on her face, a bout of yawning, a bloated feeling in the belly, etc.) that correlates with a woman's getting her period within 24 hours. To become established as a hargasha, it must have happened three times in a row.
 
Note Cramps for most women may be a hargasha, since they may mean that the woman is about to have her period.
 
When a woman has a hargasha, we assume that her period has started, and she should immediately stop what she is doing and check internally with a bedika cloth. If she does a bedika as soon as possible and the cloth shows a forbidden color, or shows no discharge at all, she immediately becomes nida for at least 12 days, after which she goes to the mikva
Note If she had a hargasha and finds no blood and no discharge, she becomes a nida, since we assume there was blood and she just didn't find it.  If the bedika cloth shows brown, magenta, salmon, brick, amber, orange, etc., the rabbi will want to see the cloth to determine her status.
Note Most medium browns are OK.
 
What To Do If Not Sure
If she is not sure she has had a hargasha, she asks a rabbi and together they will sort out the answer.
 
 
Nida D'Rabanan
 
Stain (without Hargasha)
 
Stain Colors
A rabbi should be consulted in all matters of questionable colors of stains.  Some may seem to you to be forbidden but turn out to be permissible, and vice versa.
 
Stain Location
A stain of a color that could make a woman a nida can be on material or on the woman's body. None of the following lenient conditions apply if the woman is nida d'oraita:
 
Stains on Material
A stain on material must conceivably have been in contact with the lower regions of her body (nightgown, sheet, towel, etc.). A stain on material makes the woman a nida only if ALL FOUR following conditions apply:
1. Stain Is on White Material.
2. Stain Is on Material that Can Become Impure (mikabel tum'a)—natural materials such as cotton or silk.
Note A combination of polyester and cotton counts as cotton.
3. Stain Is at least Size of Gris/US penny.
Note A bunch of disconnected stains will not be a problem as long as no one of them is at least a gris on its own.
4. Stain Is Not Positively Attributable to Another Cause (such as hemorrhoids).
Note If the woman finds a stain (even during or after the seven clean days), even if it is more than the size of a gris, she is OK if the material is not white OR is not mikabel tum'a. However, it the stain is larger than half of a US dollar bill, she should consult a rabbi.
If she had a hargasha before she found the stain, none of these leniencies apply.
 
Stains on Woman's Body
If a woman finds a stain on the lower regions of her body, it will make her a nida if it is:
  1. Not positively attributable to another cause, AND
  2. At least the size of a gris. For small, unconnected spots, she must evaluate whether, together, they equal the size of a gris (on material, the spots DO NOT get combined). If yes, she should consult a rabbi.
 
 
II. HARCHAKOT: How Do the Couple Conduct Themselves while the Wife is a Nida?
 
According to Torah law, when a woman is a nida, she and her husband are prohibited not only from having intercourse, but also (“lo tikrav”—Vayikra 18:19) from having any physical contact of a passionate or romantic nature (negiya shel chibuk v'nishuk)--those patterns of physical contact that often lead to intercourse. Since the penalty for violation is kareit, husband and wife should live separately during the nida period, but because we don't, we use “distancers” (harchakot) as reminders of distance while living together in the same home. The harchakot sensitize us to the smallest gestures of love. The couple who know that in a finite amount of time their union will not only be permitted, but even be davar sh'bekedusha--a thing of sanctity--will have the willpower to wait it out.
 
These harchakot are applied during the nida period:
 
General Harchakot
S'chok v'Kalut Rosh In general, avoid fun activities which could lead to lightheadedness)
 
Negiya Afilu b'Etzba Ketana Avoid any physical contact, even if not romantic.
 
The Bedroom
Mita Achat ("Single Bed") Do not share one bed. You must have two separate beds, but there is no standard for how far apart the separate mattresses and linens should be, except that they must be more than 1 tefach (3.5 inches) apart from each other. If there is one headboard, one bed should be moved away from the headboard.
 
L'Hatzia Mitato b'Fanav The wife may not, in front of her husband, prepare his bed for sleeping (as opposed to the chore of making the beds in the morning).
 
Sitting on the Bed The husband may not sit or lie on wife's bed unless she is out of town; the wife may not lie on her husband's bed in his presence.
 
Wining and Dining
K'ara Achat ("Single Plate") Husband and wife may not share a plate as they eat. A husband may not eat of his wife's leftovers unless someone else ate from it in between, it was transferred to another plate, or she has left the table for the duration of the meal.  
 
Shulchan Echad ("Single Table") You may not eat at the same table unless you put an item between yourselves that is not normally on the table. Reminders (heker) can be napkin rings, a flower, a food item known not to be part of the meal, etc. Special placemats are also acceptable reminders.
Note If other people are sharing the meal with you, you do not need a reminder.
 
Hagashat Ochel Li'Fanav ("Serving Food in Front of Him") The wife may not directly serve her husband food except in an altered way.
Example
The wife may put the plate to the side of her husband instead of in front of him.
 
Mezigat HaKos Bi'Fanav The husband may not pour his wife a cup of any drink in front of her. The wife may not pour her husband a cup of any drink in front of him.
 
Lishlo'ach La Kos Bracha The husband may not even send or pass a cup of wine to his wife, even by someone else and even if she is in a different room. After the husband makes kiddush, havdala, or sheva brachot, he puts the wine down in front of himself and then his wife may take the cup and drink. If there are other people present, the husband may pour wine into several cups and one of them may be passed to his wife (since no specific cup was designated for his wife).
 
Individual Harchakot
Histaklut b'Mkomot HaMechusim The man may not gaze appreciatively at those parts of the woman's body that are normally covered.
 
Hoshata M'Yad L'Yad ("Passing from Hand to Hand") The couple may not pass things by hand to each other.
 
Zerika MiYad L'Yad The husband or wife may not throw something for the other to catch.
 
Safsal Mitnaded  The couple may not sit on any surface that is not firmly attached to the ground and in which the movement of one person causes the other person to move.
 
Tiyul baSfina O Agala: The couple may not take a pleasure (destination-less) trip on a boat or wagon. However, if they have a destination, it is OK.
 
Perfume The husband may not intentionally smell his wife's perfume (even if she is not wearing it!).
 
Yitzikat V'Hava'at Mayim V'Richitzat Panav, Yadav, V'Raglav Except for mitzvot, the wife may not draw or bring water to wash his hand, face, or feet or draw his bath for him.
 
Illness The wife may do what the husband needs if he is sick. If the wife is sick, the husband may only help her in cases of substantial need.
 
III. Tahara after Nida:
The Five Steps of Purification
 
1. Minimum Duration of Nida
A woman will be a nida even if she saw blood on only one day. But she must wait until the fifth day before she may begin counting her seven clean days (in unusual circumstances, she MAY be permitted to reduce the 5 initial day count--consult a rabbi).
Note In counting nida (bleeding) days (as opposed to clean days), part of a day counts as a full day. 
Example If the bleeding starts at 2p on Wednesday, the woman counts from 2p until sundown as Day 1. Thursday is Day 2, etc. Sunday before sundown, she may do the first bedika
 
2.  Hefsek Tahara
On the fifth day (or whenever--after the fifth day--the bleeding and staining seems to be ending), she does a hefsek tahara to check very carefully internally to make sure all the bleeding and staining is over. The hefsek tahara has three parts:
  1. Wash or cleanse lower regions of the body.
  2. Do an internal check/bedika: Insert a white cloth into vagina and circle it around to make sure to get every nook and cranny.
  3. Moch dachuk: Insert a bedika cloth within two halachic hours of sunset and leave it in until after dark.
Reason The seven clean days must be complete days.  Since we don't know exactly what time the first day begins, the cloth is inserted before sunset of the first “clean” day.
Note If doing this causes any problem for her, she should consult a rabbi.
 
3.  Count of Seven Clean Days with Three Components
  1. Bedika
The woman must have seven complete consecutive halachic days free of any impure discharge (generally means bleeding). She should make an internal examination each day when she gets up, and another before sunset. If this regimen will cause her problems, she should consult a rabbi.
 
  1. White Underpants
During the seven clean days, the woman must wear white underpants. But if she wears tight-fitting underpants, as in contemporary clothing, only the part under the vaginal area must be white.
Note If the woman has any bleeding during or after the seven clean days, she should consult a rabbi.  
 
  1. No Hesech Da'at
A woman does not need to think about the seven clean days all of the time, but she must keep in mind, during the entire nida purification process, that she is not in an active nida state.  
Situation A woman found a stain and asked a rabbi about it. She assumed she was definitely nida.
What To Do Once she assumes that she has become a nida during that seven-day period, she must begin her count again--even once she has found out that she was not, in fact, a nida
Note If she asked the rabbi while not yet assuming that she was definitely a nida, she may continue her original count after the rabbi determines that she was not a nida.

4.  Chafifa
Chafifa General Rules
The woman must do total body cleansing, particularly the hairy areas, to make sure there is no intervening substance (chatzitza). Anything that is not part of the body, and which can be fairly easily removed, should be removed before immersing in a mikva.
Reason In order for a woman to become tehora, she needs to be totally immersed in the mikva all at one time, with no chatzitza between her and the mikva waters.
There are three definitions of chatzitza:
a.   D'Oraita
According to Torah law, something is only a chatzitza if it is “ruba v'makpida”—something that covers the body AND bothers the woman. Very few chatzitzot are in this category; here are some:
  • Full body cast.
  • Being covered with sand.
  • Being sweaty from head to toe.
b.   D'Rabanan
Chazal said a chatzitza is something that covers the body OR bothers the woman. 
Examples
  • Moisturizer that covers most of her body.
  • Adhesive that is left on her skin after a band-aid has been removed.
  • Imperfect manicure, if she would not go to an interview like that.
c.    Nashim Nahagu
Nashim Nahagu means a practice that women took upon themselves: Everything that a woman can easily get off, she tries to get off--even if it covers only a small part of the body and it does not bother her at all. This is a custom (minhag) that later became a d'rabanan halacha.
Note In cases in which this type of halacha generates a shalom bayit issue or would cause someone to avoid immersing in the mikva, consult a rabbi.
 
Chafifa: Nails, Teeth, Contact Lenses
Cutting Nails
The woman should cut her nails at least flush with the fingertips. 
Note If a woman would not want to immerse in the mikva because she doesn't want to cut her nails, ask a rabbi.
Cleaning Teeth/Removing Contact Lenses
The woman must clean her teeth and remove contact lenses even though the mikva waters do not need to contact the internal surfaces of the mouth or the eyes.
Reason While the woman is not required to open her mouth or eyes while immersing, the water must be able to make contact if she did open her mouth or eyes.

If You Forgot
If she is already home or after having relations, she found she had forgotten to take out her lenses, or she finds another chatzitza, she should ask a rabbi
 
5.  Immersion in Mikva/Tevila
Mikva: Timing
 
When To Go To Mikva
If her husband is in town, it is a mitzva to go to the mikva as soon as halachically permitted.
 
When Mikva in Unsafe Neighborhood
If the mikva is in a neighborhood that is unsafe at night, she may go during the day (she immerses on the eighth day instead of the night of the seventh night).
 
When Mikva Night Is Friday Night

Any woman whose mikva night is Friday night SHOULD make every effort to go to the mikva that night.
 
If Mikva Too Far
If mikva night is Friday night and the mikva is not within walking distance (and/or there is inclement weather), in general she may postpone going until after Shabbat is over.  Consult a rabbi about driving Friday afternoon and immersing before dark for such instances as:
  • Shalom Bayit (in this case, she is not permitted see her husband until after dark Friday night).
  • Dangerous Neighborhood.
  • Infertility Issues (if she will miss ovulation if she does not go Friday night).
 
Preparations before Friday Night
Ideally, the woman should complete her full-scale mikva preparation--including bath and shower--before Shabbat, light candles before Shabbat, walk to the mikva, immerse after dark, and then walk home.
If the mikva is within walking distance and the weather is inclement, the first-level b'di'avad is to finish preparing for Shabbat and mikva, including making a blessing on the Shabbat candles (verbally stipulating that she is not accepting Shabbat at this lighting), be driven to the mikva, and wait until her turn to immerse.
 
Mikva: How To Immerse
Kosher immersion/tevila requires simultaneous immersion of every exposed part of the body (not bet ha'starim).   Here is the best way to accomplish simultaneous immersion:
  • Enter the water until it is about 12 inches above the navel. 
  • Make sure that every part of your body is relaxed (if you squeeze anything, you create crevices and cracks that impede complete access to your skin). 
  • “Flesh”/basar is exposed to the water when standing while leaning a little forward.
  • Exhale and push yourself under the water until you are certain that all of your body and all of your hair are submerged. 
  • Once your head is above the surface of the water, say the blessing and then immerse again, the same way.

Back Home
If neither spouse wants to have marital relations, that is no problem; however, if either one wants to, the spouse is required to accommodate the interested spouse.
Exception If a spouse does not feel well (not if too tired--that is no excuse!): RMH uses this guideline: If you feel so bad that you would not go out of house to pick up $500, you are sick!
 
IV. Anticipating the Next Period/Veset
 
What To Anticipate
In anticipating the time of the month when her period is most likely to occur (onat ha'veset), a woman must determine both:
  1. The day of the month, and
  2. Whether it will begin during the daytime period (sunrise to sunset) or the nighttime period (from sunset to sunrise)
Note This period may be more or less than 12 hours!
What To Do
Once the woman has determined her onat ha'veset, she and her husband must abstain from relations during that daytime or nighttime period. If the onat ha'veset passed and the period did not come (determined by 1 or 2 bedikot during the onat ha'veset), then the husband and wife may resume a normal marital relationship until her period comes.
Note Although the halacha refers to abstaining from relations during that period, many people are stringent (machmir) to also abstain from intimate affectionate contact (negiya shel chibuk v'nishuk).  But additional prohibitions (harchakot) beyond negiya shel chibuk v'nishuk, such as passing food, sitting on a moving object that one person moves, etc., do not apply to this anticipation period.
Note Many people also abstain from relations and intimate contact during the day and night preceding the expected veset.
 
Regular and Irregular
Every woman needs to be able to anticipate her next period, whether she is a) regular or b) irregular. “Regular” is determined by any pattern to one's menstrual cycle that occurs three times in a row.
Note It is very uncommon for a woman to maintain her regular period for a long time.
 
Anticipating a Regular Period
Here are the five most classic regular patterns:
  1. Veset HaChodesh (Monthly Cycle)
Veset ha'chodesh is when the period appears in three consecutive months:
a) On the exact same Jewish-calendar date, and
b) All three times at night, or all three times during the day.
Example
A woman gets her period on these three dates:
12 Tishrei--night
12 Cheshvan—night
12 Kislev—night
 
The couple will abstain 12 Tevet—night.
Note Many people begin to abstain from the 11th during the day.
 
  1. Veset Haflaga (Intervals Cycle)
Veset haflaga is when the menstrual period appears on four consecutive occasions at three intervals of identical length apart and they are either all during the daytime or all during the nighttime.
 
  1. Veset HaGuf (Body Symptoms Cycle)
In veset ha'guf, the menstrual period comes within one day after a very specific symptom that is experienced as heralding the period, such as lower back ache, aching breasts, etc.
 
  1. Veset HaMurkav (Combination Cycle)
In veset ha'murkav, the woman is regular, three times in a row, for a Body Symptom (#3:  Veset HaGuf) in conjunction with either a Monthly Cycle (#1:  Veset HaChodesh) or an Intervals Cycle (#2:  Veset Haflaga).
Example
On the 10th of three Hebrew months in a row, a woman gets lower abdominal cramps; and on the 12th of each Hebrew month, for three months in a row, she gets her period. 
Note If she gets cramps on the 11th of the month, she does not need to separate and she may ignore those symptoms for that month. She will separate once she gets her period.  
 
5. Veset HaMa'aseh (Action Cycle)
In veset ha'ma'aseh, a particular activity has caused her period to come three months in a row.
Example
A woman goes to a sauna and that causes her period.
 
Anticipating an Irregular Period
A woman with an irregular period may have to abstain from relations and affectionate intimate contact (negiya shel chibuk v'nishuk) during these three onot/time periods:
  1. Yom HaChodesh
Same Hebrew calendar date and the same daytime or nighttime period as her prior period started (but it has not yet been three times in a row).
 
  1. Haflaga
Same interval of days between her two most recent periods, projected to the next month (daytime or nighttime period).
 
  1. Ona Beinonit
Thirtieth day after the most recent period when counting intervals.  Count from Day 1 of Period 1 through Day 1 of Period 2.
Note The 30-day interval includes both start days.
Note The 30th day, every other month, will be the same as Yom HaChodesh.